Alien Terminator
THE STORY: YE GODS! This movie SUCKED! It had the potential to be cool, cheesy-wise, but it failed. That's a pretty big feat because I wasn't expecting much. I was really hoping it would be corny and cheesy enough to make me laugh, but it was simply an alien rip-off with absolutely no thrills or passion.
The evil corporation of Earthtek (all corporations are evil in the movies) has six scientists in an underground complex called Biocom. They've been there for two years underground, working on research and studying the effects of isolation on humans. One of the scientists, Newton Fuller is secretly working for the company trying to create a genetic viral thingie to make really badass super warriors. He's also a drug addict and while getting high in his lab accidentally succeeds. His mutant creation kills his pet rat, Galileo and the cat. Then it uses the doctor, a fat guy called "Coach" for some reason, as a host. In a scene that is totally, and I mean totally ripped off from Alien the creature bursts forth from Coach's body while the crew is enjoying their last meal before being released from the biosphere thingie...just like the scene in Alien where the creature bursts out of the guy's body when the crew is enjoying their last meal before going into cryo-sleep. (only THIS movie SUCKS!)The monster then goes on a long and drawn out reign of boredo---I mean terror, killing Newton. The others, Pete, Rachel, McKay and Taylor try to escape. Earthtek claims they died in a freak accident before the hatch is opened, but they are still down there...now here's the part that made me really hate this movie...the news reporter claims the information of the scientists deaths is equal to the tragedy of the Challenger space shuttle. Yeah, this is just a crappy movie, but FUCK THAT! To in any way try to add any sense of tragedy or tension to this movie the writers using the Challenger...its sick. If this movie was actually good, I may not be this angry...but it sucked, the writers suck and I only hope the brave souls of the astronauts of the Challenger forgive us.
To make a long story thankfully short, Taylor and McKay make it out alive and expose Earthtek's plans. The end. This is the second movie I have reviewed with Maria Ford. (The first being Angel of Destruction.) Ms. Ford has officially made my shit-list for being in this awful dungheap of a movie.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?:
1.) Theres a really stupid VR scene with fuller monkeying around with DNA. It was too long and that's what started to piss me off about this movie.
2.) Um, how much did this cost? Making an underground dwelling for these scientists for 2 years? what was it supposed to accomplish, besides Earthtek's nefarious plans? It must have cost a fortune but it had no real goal? studying isolation on humans doesn't wash. You can do that without building an underground biodome five miles into the earth. Stupid ass movie.
3.) This movie so completely and shamelessly rips Alien off, I don't know what to say. I hope they got sued.
4.) I could go on but this whole movie sucked too bad to make me want to spend too much effort on it.
NUDITY AND SEX: Having the biggest boobs, Rachel shows them. In one unneeded shower scene and in having sex with Pete.
HUH?: When Fuller realizes he's created a monster he records this message about "Unlike Dr. Frankenstein I harbor no love for the monster" and "What I create I can destroy!"...excuse me, but that's EXACTLY LIKE VICTOR FRANKENSTEIN! If you meet any of the scriptwriters from this movie, please kick them in the ass.
After Taylor and McKay escape the complex blows up. Why?
THE TALLY: This movie was bad. Do not rent it. If you own a copy burn it. Its an Alien rip-off and it should be banned by the UNHC. Hey, its only my opinion, but its my web site and I banish this sin against humanity to the deepest darkest pit of the Inferno where it may rot for eternity!
