THE STORY:  This movie made me think of the time I rented "Angel of Destruction". At the time there was a guy in line at the video store that saw me renting it and he went on and on about how great he thought the movie was. I didn't really know what to say. I was renting it because I thought it would be cheesy. So I thought this gentleman was, shall we say, easily entertained and probably not in possession of a high IQ. I'll be he thinks this movie is like a female Enter the Dragon.

The instant I saw Roger Corman presents on the box I didn't expect much. This movie has a slimy feel to it that hard to put into words. Still, I wanted to see Cat Sassoon in a starring role. She sure ain't no Cynthia Rothrock, but she reminded me of Maria Ford in this flick. I've only seen Sassoon in one other movie to date, and that was her small role in Bloodfist 6: Ground Zero. I'll admit, I think she's mildly attractive but she didn't impress me in this movie. First she has enough makeup on to be a runner up in a Tammy Faye Bakker lookalike contest. I don't know if she had her lips done, but it sure looks like it to me...and she's got them positively smeared in glossy lipstick which makes her look like a clown. For awhile I thought she was trying to play the Joker, or maybe Ronald McDonald. I'm completely positive that she had her breasts done. Those things don't move, jiggle or anything. They're like two coconut halves someone slapped onto her chest with crazy glue.

The plot of this thing is merely a tool to get from lame fight scene to lame fight scene interspersed with plenty of shots of women showering. That's why this movie made me feel slimy. I couldn't even watch in one sitting, I had to wait for my wife to go to work. I found all the nudity that gratuitous that I didn't want my wife to see it. The plot, for what its worth is Kat Lang (Sassoon), an LA policewoman, goes to the Philippines to find out about her sister's death. She meets a gambler named "Alcatraz" (Michael Shaner) who agrees to help her. Her sister, Christy, was killed because she's been working with the US embassy in Manila to expose some revolutionaries called the "Black Brigade". The BB wants the US to leave the Philippines so they've been murdering officials. Somehow this ties in with the Women's Karate Championship so Kat enters it in order to smoke the bad guys out. Throw in the MacGuffin of a roll of film Christy hid away and Lorda (Melissa Moore), a tall blonde agent also posing as a fighter and you've got your basic plot of this thing. All the director had to do was throw boobs at the camera after that. Hey, I like boobs as much as the next joe, but I don't need to see them every five minutes. I'd say the movie tried to get creative by showing Sassoon nude except for panties in a fight with two or three assailants if the same thing hadn't been done in Angel of Destruction. At least AoD was bad enough to make me chuckle. This movie was just unexciting and made me want to take a shower.

Hmmmm...now that I think about it...this movie is Angel of Destruction! It has the same stinking plot! Why do I get the feeling that if I go to the IMDb and check I'll find that Roger Corman produced both movies? Geez...what's next, a sequel...Maria Ford and Cat Sassoon team up as topless ninjas in "Angel Fist of Destruction"? Mr. Corman, you have absolutely no shame.

Best Lines: "You're definitely right...I could kick your ass."- Kat to Alcatraz as they start a beautiful friendship.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?:

1.) Ah, the tried and true method of showing that the hero or heroine in a movie is a real bad ass. Usually this involves some kind of scene in the beginning where the hero or heroine has to stop a mugger, thwart a robbery or save a life in a dramatic fashion. I certainly hope the writer,director and producer are reading this 'cuz I only want to say it once...Such a scene only works when the hero does something that no one else could have! The scene where Kat jumps through the window and shoots some bad guys was pointless! With at least two dozen cops outside I'm supposed to believe they had to wait for Kat to show up the shoot the crooks?

2.) If you're partial to blondes then forget the California beach! You oughtta attend the Women's Karate Championship in the Philippines because 90% of the contestants are blonde white chicks that look hot!

3.) Yeah...its always a good idea point a gun and to stand two feet away from a person that you know is an expert at hand to hand combat, Quirino. Its not like they'll try to disarm you anything....

NUDITY AND SEX:  Almost EVERY woman in this movie is seen nude or topless at one point. Alcatraz and Kat have sex and the camera is careful to always show Kat's tits.

HUH?:  So what exactly did Quirino's men do to Lorda when he told them to make her talk? Well, it certainly looked like they were going to sodomize her. Oh, yuck. This movie is chock full of things that are pretty degrading to women, but that part was just plain tasteless. Why? Because, just like in the reprehensible movie Skyscraper, Lorda doesn't seem to suffer anything from the rape. Any time after that scene she looks clean and fit...her hair isn't even mussed! Its like being sodomized over a block of ice is no big deal for her, just all in a days work. That's simply offensive to any women that have suffered such a horrible crime. Of course, maybe that's not what happened...we don't SEE her being raped....but it damn sure looked like it and this movie has run out of the benefit of the doubt.

They should have titled this movie "AngelBreasts". I don't think there's a period of any ten minutes during the entire thing when you don't get to glimpse some boobs. Lorda's escape plan was gratuitous in the extreme. She tells one of the Phillippino (is it Filipino? I don't know and I apologize if I'm spelling it wrong) guards that if he does her a favor she'll do him one. She further entices him by saying "when was the last time you had a blonde?" So this guy, who clearly must be a total whacko, unties her after opening her shirt and being awed by her breasts. Hmmm....I'm gonna have to cry foul. Are we to believe that this committed revolutionary is so hard up for some blonde poontang that he'd untie Lorda...a woman that he knows is an expert fighter and government agent? I'd even say that its offensive to phillipino's and minorities to suggest that they all really want to screw white chicks, but this scene was really only another excuse to show boobs.

How did Alcatraz beat the three guys that jumped him? He hasn't shown any fighting skills in the entire movie. All of a sudden he's Steven Seagal. I don't buy that at all. He didn't even get hurt!

THE TALLY: It will seem hypocritical of the Inferno to award this movie less than its twin, Angel of Destruction, but thems the breaks. Its a fine line between cheesiness and badness. This movie crossed it, and the result is that its more tiresome to watch than fun. The fight scenes aren't done very well, and they're not funny bad. But if you want to see loads of tit this might be worth no more than 99 cents on a rental.