Starring:

Starring: James Brolin, Kathleen Lloyd, John Marley, Ronny Cox

Directed by: Elliot Silverstein

The Story: Now this takes me back! In several other forays into the Inferno I know I've mentioned the old state theater in my home town, Newark, Delaware. Sadly the old State theater was torn down years ago....and that makes me angry and sad....but I still have fond memories of the old place. My cousin Mooney and I would spend a lot of summer afternoons there watching the flicks. One of those flicks was...The Car.

Hey, when I first saw that the Car was on DVD I was shocked. I didn't really have any memories of it except that I had seen it as a kid and that the face of the Devil is seen in the Car's ultimate explosion. (Hope I didn't ruin that for ya). Surprisingly, a coworker of mine saw that I had the DVD and mentioned that same occurrence. and that the Devil face was scary as a kid but as an adult he didn't see it. I think he's right.

After seeing this movie again I wish I knew a little more....like where did the Car come from? Its never explained, its just assumed that the Car is from Hell is driven by the devil or something like that. Somewhere in the Western United states, by one of those small towns that can only exist in movies, two bicycle riders are run down by a mysterious black car. Back in the movie town Sheriff's deputy Wade is awakened by his girlfriend Lauren. Lauren is a local teacher and Wade has two young daughters. The kids don't really impact anything that happens after this, but they do establish that Wade has an ex-wife somewhere else. They don't even have a problem with Lauren. Wow. A cozy little family. Meanwhile the Car is busy running over a hitchhiker right outside of the home of Amos Clements, a local wife beating contractor. Amos witnesses this but when the Sheriff, Everett and Wade question him about it he can barely describe the car in any detail. Everett is more interested in the bruises he sees on Amos' wife, as they were High School sweethearts, but this subplot goes nowhere. Mostly because Everett gets run down by the car a little later on. (At any rate, time wasn't good to ol' Everett....he looks to be a tad older than Amos' wife.)

There really isn't any big time drama in this flick. The mysterious black Car just runs people over, seemingly out of sheer malice. No explanation is given for it, except that its evil. Wade takes charge of the police force once Everett is road kill, and he tackles the Car problem as if it were an ordinary (not supernatural car) vehicle with a homicidal driver. The Car attacks a local rodeo where the kids from the school are having some sort of marching band parade. Lauren and her friend Margie lead the kids to safety in a local graveyard. The Car won't enter the graveyard, but Lauren taunts it, daring its driver to get out of the vehicle and confront her. Instead the Car goes nuts doing donuts in the dust and revving its engine. Margie manages to sneak away and contact the police. Wade and the other deputies speed to the rescue, but the Car takes off to a waiting roadblock. the deputy that spots the Car first gives chase, only to find himself pushed over a cliff by the demonic automobile. After that the Car makes short work of the other cops....in what must have been an amazing stunt to pull off way back when the car rolls on its sides on top of two pursuing police cars crushing the occupants. Wade finally arrives on his Suzuki motorcycle and finds that the car is impervious to bullets. When he gets close to it he sees that it has no door handles. The windows are tinted red so no one can see inside. The drivers side door opens and hits him, knocking him out.

Wade awakens in the hospital. He's unharmed really. His friend, and fellow deputy Luke is very upset about the entire Car thing. Lauren is there also but has very little lines except the usual "Are you alright" stuff. Luke by the way, is a recovering alcoholic. Earlier in the movie we find this out....just before we see Luke sneaking a drink,. But nothing really ever comes of this sub plot either. The only other thing to mention about Luke is that he's played by Ronny Cox. Younger readers may recognize him as Dick Jones, the evil bastard in Robocop, or the evil bastard in Total recall....or the evil bastard Captain Jellico from Star Trek: the next generation. (Ok, Jellico wasn't evil...but he was a prick.) Wade has the Native American deputy Chaz give Lauren a ride home so she can fetch some clothes and then go to his house to stay with his kids while he's in the hospital. But Chaz leaves Lauren alone for a few minutes after dropping her off so he can check on his family down the road. That's when The car makes its move. The car literally drives right through Lauren's living room, killing her. I'll admit I was a bit shocked. the hero's girlfriend gets killed?! Holy moley! 

That's when Luke makes a big ass guess. he surmises that the Car didn't kill Lauren and the kids when they hid on the graveyard because it can't enter hallowed ground. everyone else that died was killed on the road. The reason the Car killed Lauren in her house was because she cursed at it. Hey, whatever he's been drinking I want some. The only thing about this part that makes the least bit of sense to me is that Luke was right. How he all of a sudden gained such knowledge is more than I know, but ultimately he was right.

Which leads me back to the big question...where the F*** did the car come from? We're never told. now I know way back when this flick was made all ya had to do was mention the devil or demon cults or Damien or something and kids flocked to the theater. I was one of them. But when you don't even bother to explain why the Devil would have a big ass black car and drive around the middle of nowhere running random folks over, I have to question it. By the way, the Reason I called the little town the kind of place you'd only find in movies...is well, because it is! Everyone seems to know everyone else and everyone seems to get along. (with the exception of the mean wife-beater Amos) Tell me where this town is...I want to move there!

As for jerk wad Amos he gets to be a hero at the end. Wade decides to set a trap for the car, luring it into a desert canyon and blowing it up, burying what's left under tons of rock. For that he needs Amos, who as a contractor has loads of explosives. This is where the devil face part comes into play. But before I get to that I was a bit surprised at how the Car was trapped. You see, earlier in the movie we see that the car has really good maneuverability. It can accelerate fast and stop fairly quickly...almost on the proverbial dime. But when Luke and Wade jump out of its way and watch it fall into the rigged canyon I wondered why didn't it just slam on the brakes? It certainly seemed to be able to do that quickly when it had wade trapped in his garage.

No matter...the car is   blown to bits and the infamous "face of the devil" is seen in the flames. as stated before I remember that part from childhood and all I can tell ya is that my memory of it was a lot more scary than actually seeing it now. Its not that there isn't what you could a face seen, its that its just not that scary. maybe in 1979 it was, but now...FAH! I see scarier faces on Network TV. Hell, Him, from the Power puff girls looks scarier than that flame face. If you're renting this movie based on expectations of the flaming Devil face all I can say is "Dude! you got Gypped!".

Wade was played by James Brolin. an insert in the DVD box calls him the star of West world and AAMCO commercials. Yeesh. I liked West world good enough and he was probably the star, but when the only other credit you can give him is AAMCO commercials...man, do I really have to say more? After all, I like George Foreman well enough, but I hope he more stuff on his resume other than hawkin' grills. (But Foreman is right...those grills are dyn-o-mite!)

Best Lines:  “...and If'n' I hear another sound from that thing I'll ram it so far up your ass you'll be fartin' music for a year!" Amos to a French horn playing hitchhiker...the best line in the movie and one I actually remember from childhood.

 Are you kidding me?

1.) The bicycles the victims are riding in the start of the movie...do they even make that style of bike anymore? Its not a nit, its just nostalgia. I had a bike like that once.

2.) Hilarious. One of Lauren's older colleagues shows her a picture that a student drew of Lauren naked. The older woman thinks that its inappropriate for a 13 year old boy to be thinking about his teacher naked. Lady, that's all 13 year old boys do think about. Hell, that's all BOYS period think about, except for maybe gay boys. When I was 13 I couldn't stop staring at my English teachers breasts to save my life. I don't think I learned anything that year except that she had nice boobs. Besides...the picture she shows Lauren is well drawn. that kid should get an art scholarship!

3.) One thing of note...in  most movies of this type...small town besieged by evil force...there seems to only be 2 or 3 cops...including the chief! At least in this one we see that there are about ten to fifteen people on the local police force. (probably more...I'm only commenting on what we can see). Kudos to the flick for that.

4.) Holy Crud! Ain't there a weight requirement for cops? There's one cop that must weigh 300 pounds! I find it infuriating that the military has strict weight standards yet the police don't. This is real life, not just movie tirade going on here, my droogies. How many times do you interact with the police in say, a year? How many times do you interact with a soldier?  I'm betting the police have more of an impact on your life daily. So why are there fat ass cops? Its a freaking' travesty. Why should I watch my weight and all when I can potentially be sent to some hell hole to get shot at when some cop....responsible for the safety of the civilian population back home...can eat friggin' Micky-D's all day and be a lard ass. Okay...calm down, Dante...Calm down....

5.) When Deputy Chaz asks Wade if he saw the driver and what he looked like I muttered to myself  "Well, he had a pointy tail, 2 horns on his head and oh, he had the face of a goat and red skin...no offense, Chaz.....". Guess ya had to be there. I laughed.

Nudity and Sex: None.

Huh?:

Luke has a weak stomach for a policeman. He seems really upset over the deaths of the bikers....and everything else's. Yeah, its established that he knew one of the bikers well, but still, I'd expect a cop to have a bit more of an iron will than Luke has. Maybe he should be a therapist or something.

Speaking of Luke, how does he make this big connection with Hallowed Ground and the Car and all that? Its not like the car has a big pentagram license plate or anything. It just comes out of the blue! as I said earlier, he's right, but he's right because as my cousin clucky would put it "Its in the script.".

The Car's first victim....the female biker...is squished between the marauding car and a brick wall,,,,but when see her body flung over the side of the roadside cliff the wall is gone. Watch it and tell me I'm wrong!

The Final Judgment: Like some cheese the older it is the better it is. The car was never meant to be a horror icon....I'm sure this involved in it wish it was, but face facts. It was a cheap ass drive-In type flick (when there were still drive-ins) and attraction for bored kids. And as such its all right. There's nothing wrong with watching this movie for what it is. Its not that scary and its not really bad. Ignore the plot holes and you might enjoy it.