Starring:

Bruce Boxleitner, Megan Gallagher, Lin Shaye, Jeffrey Combs   Directed by: John Murlowski    Written by: Russell V. Manzatt

The Story:

Don't bother to watch this one since you've already seen it. What? You haven't? Are you sure? Let me run down the basics for you to see if it jogs your memory....A madman unleashes a super virus and holds a VIP/City/The World hostage since he has the only cure. Enter the genius doctor that is not only the best in her field but very attractive and caring that must find a cure in a limited amount of time. Heck, throw in the old "If we can't stop this virus we'll have to nuke the town" ending and you've got this movie in a nutshell. Ring any bells? You might not have seen THIS movie but I'm betting you've seen one or two close to it....enough that you can guess what's gonna happen five minutes before it does in the flick. By the Devil's Twisted Tail, I think there's a computer in Hollywood that just fills  in the blanks like character names as it spurts out ready made plots. Especially for Made-For TV movies like this one obviously is. (When am I going to take Greywizard's Advice!??)

While exiting a building, The President of The United States, Howard (Bruce Boxleitner, Captain Sheridan from Babylon Five), is shot by an unknown assailant in a building across the street. Only the gunman doesn't use a bullet, he fires a dart loaded with a super strain of Ebola. The President and his (pretty small) entourage are rushed to a nearby hospital, which is immediately locked down, while the secret service locates and brings in the best virologist in the field....Dr. Diane Landis. (Megan Gallagher, Mrs. Black from Millennium) The mystery terrorists soon contact the President and his staff and tell him that if they don't get a butt load of money they won't give up the cure that they've developed. But to prove they have a cure, they inform them that there are several vials of medicine hidden in the hospital...the medicine will not cure the virus but will give the infected a few extra hours to live. Howard refuses to deal with terrorists so Dr. Landis must find a cure before its too late. The terrorists...all 2 of them...are Brown and Dr. Laura Crowley. Brown is played by Jeffrey Combs! Now, its not like Combs is the biggest star in Hollywood, but I have to admit I was a little bothered to see him slumming in this fetid turd of a movie. Guess he needed to pay the cable bill or something. Lin Shaye, whom I've never heard of, really, is Dr. Crowley. The rundown is that Crowley has some ill-defined grudge against President Howard. Something about being sent to Africa to help with an Ebola epidemic and accidentally killing her patients, or whatever.

This movie doesn't take it easy on you either. Almost as soon as the President and his staff are quarantined, General Ryker shows up outside the hospital with a battalion of soldiers, even though the President doesn't want them there. Ryker is some kind of political rival to the President  and the Commander and Chief doesn't want to give him any leverage by ordering him away. Right. But that's not the worst of it, my droogies....Dr. Landis befriends a little boy in the hospital named Dusty. as soon as this kid came on the screen I knew that the words emblazoned on the front door of the Inferno were true...."Abandon All Hope". I don't have a big grudge against kids in movies...but Dusty apparently is an orphan who has full run of the hospital....in other words, he keeps sneaking out of the children's ward and running around on his own. He's also one of those "so cute you can't get mad at 'em" kids. Well, he's not really that cute, but no one seems to get terribly upset that he's running around wherever he wants to. (Haley Joel Osment this kid ain't) Of course Dusty begs Dr. Landis to let him see the President. You just know that the little crumb snatcher is gonna have something to do with the climax of this movie.

Did I mention that  Brown and Crowley have their secret Headquarters in the basement of the Hospital? Yep, that's right. The Secret Service can't really trace their calls but the criminals are basically right under them. Didn't they, you know, search the hospital at all? Seeing how the President is in there. Stupid movie. But I guess they needed top be close by so Crowley can kidnap Dusty. (Told YA) All because Dusty met Crowley in Africa with his parents that died of Ebola....don't ask....and now Dusty has the antibodies in his blood that Landis can make a cure out of. And yeah, if she doesn't do it soon a nuke is going to go off in the hospital so that the Ebola strain doesn't spread outside into the general population. That option wouldn't even be necessary if Landis spent more time working on a cure instead of running around the hospital finding dead cats and bantering with the President. (Or if she had a staff of more than ONE guy.)

There's nothing particularly interesting about this flick unless you just like crappy movies. I can't call it a bad movie, but its not a good one. Its kind of like a coke but having a Shasta Cola instead. Its still cola, but not as good.

Best Lines:  “Think about running into me in an alley in 10 years!” -Dusty tells Dr. Landis that he needs role models so doesn't become a sociopath.

Are you kidding me?

1.) Well, I didn't really do a lot of nitpicking on the uniforms in this movie, but I do have something to say about the military. When it becomes necessary to seal the hospital, Ryker's men are seen with their protective masks on, doing so. Anyone who has been in the army knows about MOPP gear. (Mission Oriented Protective Posture) I'll try to explain....you see, they only have the masks on....which is good if its a gas attack you're under. Why aren't these guys in FULL MOPP gear? There's more than just the mask to it, there's a whole suit! You'd think that with an uber-ebola virus around these guys would at least be wearing the whole shebang. (soldiers are trained to put the whole thing on in mere minutes. Trust me, they time you doing it while you train to make sure you get it right!) And why does General Ryker have a fancy see through mask? Hell, why isn't the CDC there in environment suits doing this instead of the Army?

2.) Speaking of the Army, this is plain stupid. General Ryker and his men arrive without prior orders from ANYONE. And when they arrive we see them marching down the street in a suburban neighborhood with loaded weapons. Right. Imagine, its a beautiful day, kids are playing outside, you're cutting the grass....and suddenly a battalion of armed soldiers roll down the street. First of all, that would at least piss a lot of people off....secondly it would, one would think, cause a huge panic! Its a recipe for disaster! But what really burned my patience was the fact that the President acts like he can't control Ryker. In real life Ryker would have been relieved so fast it would have made the Flash look like Slowpoke Rodriquez. (you have to be an old Looney Toons fan to get that). the President could have just said to Ryker "Take all of your men and go home. And don't talk to the press. That's an order." and that would have been that.

3.)  I don't recall ever seeing Lin Shaye in anything else, but I know from the IMDb that she does have quite a few movies in her resume. But I'll tell ya what, if I ever need someone to play a crazy old bitch, I'm picking her. The only parts of the movie where I wasn't bored were when she went over the top with the vengeful crazy old mad doctor thing. At one point O thought her neck was going to explode.

4.) Dr. Landis finds Dusty's cat, Sherry (He named his cat Sherry? What a sissy!) dead in a linen closet, under an air vent. she then concludes that the virus has become airborne. If the President and his staff are in quarantine how'd the virus get into the rest of the hospital? And how'd it kill the cat that fast? Seriously, this cat looks like its been dead for a day or so.

5.) I swear, Dr. Landis doesn't do a damned thing. Most of the movie is her talking to the President (a very boring love at first sight subplot that goes nowhere) and running around the hospital chasing Dusty. Lady, get to work!

6.) Landis meets Crowley in an elevator, although she doesn't know who she is at first. (remember I told you that Crowley's hideout is IN the hospital.) When she realizes that the woman she met is the supposed-to-be-dead Crowley, she tells the President and the Secret Service. So much for the vaunted Secret Service. They can't find this one woman in the Hospital. Yikes. Its not like Crowley's a master of disguise or anything.

Nudity and Sex: None

Huh?:

Why is there a cat in the hospital? Why? Why? Apparently Sherry is allowed to roam freely, too. I'm not ever staying at that hospital!

What the hell is Dusty in the hospital for? There's apparently nothing wrong with him. He has enough vim and vigor to run around hiding all day. He says he had his appendix taken out but he seems to be in no discomfort at all. When my wife had hers removed she was out of it for a week!

In order to liven things up a little, we have a part where a hospital administrator decides to break quarantine. He orders a helicopter to land on the roof and pick him up, even though General Ryker has restricted the air space. When the helicopter tries to land Ryker and his men block it from landing with another 'copter. Not a military one either. Which is kind of funny. They threaten to fire on the civilian aircraft if it doesn't leave immediately. The administrator guy tells the 'copter to land and ignore the army. (Yeah, I'm sure some civilian pilot would risk his life on your say-so bud) Well, Ryker does have the helicopter shot down...with a LAW! (Light Anti-Tank weapon). I guess they didn't have the budget to get a Blackhawk or an Apache or even a Huey.

So the President wants to nuke the hospital so the virus doesn't spread. I guess radiation, fallout and blast damage aren't a real concern.

This is a minor grumble, but a valid one....Ryker is set up to be red herring or at the very least a big asshole. When we first meet him in the movie President Howard is not at all happy to see him, and at one point in the movie threatens to court martial him. The way Ryker is portrayed early on,, you might get the impression that he has something to do with the Ebola plot. But by the end of the movie Ryker is somewhat of a hero and he and the President have a reconciliation. BAH! That's the cheapass made-for TV movie way of creating tension.

The Final Judgment: This is one lame movie, folks. I can only recommend it to those of us who like to see crap on the screen. What is it with Made For TV movies that make them so unbelievably bland.? The Infernal Hordes only give one devil head. if you have time to waste...and I do mean waste....you might want to try it out. If you don't, go watch the Andromeda Strain instead.