Doctor Mordrid
THE STORY: There's a character in Marvel comics known as Dr. Strange, master of the mystic arts. I really think that was the the inspiration for Dr. Mordrid. Mordrid's suit even looks kind of like that of Dr. Strange. But that's where the similarities end. A Dr. Strange comic book is at least kind of interesting.
Crimes are being committed in various places on Earth....crimes where trusted employees are stealing things like platinum, diamonds, radioactive materials and then killing themselves. All of these crimes are being monitored by Dr. Anton Mordrid. Why? Well, because Mordrid is a sorcerer! He's been sent to Earth from his home dimension by an entity known only as "Monitor" to protect it from Kabal, an evil magician from the same dimension.
As Mordrid finds out more about the thefts he begins to prepare for his upcoming battle with Kabal. His neighbor, Samantha Hunt, is a consultant to the police department and believes Mordrid is just an eccentric researcher of the occult.
Kabal arrives on Earth and gets busy. He employs two demon worshipping losers, Adrian and Irene. For what I don't know. He kills Irene shortly after and seemingly for no other reason than he's the bad guy. Adrian doesn't seem to notice that Irene is gone. When the police find Irene's body drained of blood and with a weird symbol on it, Samantha suggests that they ask Mordrid what the symbol means. He's supposed to be a real genius in the occult. When the police do visit Mordrid they arrest him. Why? Because the amulet he has around his neck has the same symbol on it like Irene's body. Incapable of simply calling a lawyer, Mordrid is held in the police station. Samantha comes to him and apologizes for this. She only sent the cops to talk to Mordrid. Mordrid is worried though. While he's imprisoned, Kabal is up to no good....specifically, Kabal plans to use the stolen elements and mix them in the Philosopher's Stone.That will open a gateway to Mordrid's big freakin' floating castle in another dimension where all the demons are locked up.
This is about mid-movie, and this is where we find out what's going on...sort of...Mordrid explains to Samantha that he and Kabal were raised together in this other dimension to be sorcerers. Kabal decided to use his powers for evil. He raised an army of demons to conquer the earth. Mordrid defeated him and had him and his demons locked away, but Kabal escaped. If he gets to the philosopher's stone he'll be able to free his demons and bring about hell on earth.
Now, the philosopher's stone is currently in the museum in New York. (where Mordrid and Samantha live) I don't know much about alchemy and magic, but I thought the philosopher's stone was a formula for turning lead into gold. Not in this movie. Its big slab of stone with a little bowl cut out of it. Confused? Join the club.
With Mordrid imprisoned, Kabal makes Adrian invulnerable for 12 hours and sends him to the police station. Adrian doesn't do anything but get arrested. (He can't be hurt but he gets arrested! what a loser!) Mordrid talks Samantha into getting his amulet from the police. Using its power she can temporarily freeze time so Mordrid can escape. Of course she does this, and they do. But Kabal is already at the museum and ready to mix up his magic gateway formula. Its only after Mordrid and Samantha escape the police and hide out in Central Park that Adrian chases after them. Unbeknownst to Adrian, Kabal removed the spell that made him invulnerable. Just out of meanness I guess.
Not able to reach the museum in time, Mordrid goes into a trance and sends his astral body there. Kabal has already begun his spell. When Mordrid's astral self appears, Kabal brings a dinosaur skeleton to life. Mordrid's astral form can't be hurt but his power is limited. In order to keep Mordrid occupied Kabal uses the dinosaurs to attack the museum's security guards. Mordrid brings another dinosaur to life to fight the first one. But the doorway has begun to open. In desperation, Mordrid uses his dinosaur to kill Kabal. Just like that and the threat is over. Almost. Adrian happens upon Samantha and Mordrid in the park. While Mordrid is in a trance Adrian tries to kill him, but Samantha gets in his way. Just then Mordrid returns to his body and freezes Adrian with his amulet. Then Samantha kicks him in the kahoonies.
His mission over, Monitor orders Mordrid to return to his home dimension. He says goodbye to Samantha and vanishes just as the police arrive. Adrian unfreezes and thinks he's still invulnerable, but gets shot in the leg. haha. A few months later we see Samantha taking care of Mordrid's pet raven Edgar Allan (The Raven, get it?) Its Christmas eve. Mordrid appears and asks her to join him on his next mission, wherever that may be. Now, at last its the end.
This wasn't even good enough to be a TV movie! It wasn't slow, but it didn't have any substance! Jeffrey Combs, who played Mordrid acted like he was asleep through most of the film. Not that he'll win an academy Award for it, but he was much better in Castle Freak and as Weyoun on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. The problem with this movie is not that it had a bad premise or a bad special effects...it just didn't have any ooomph to it. I think a third grader could have written a better script. I almost fell asleep and at one point I wanted Kabal to bring the demons to Earth....at least then there may have been some excitement!
Best Lines: "Its a real honor, babe...like meeting Jagger backstage!"-Adrian telling Irene how cool it is to actually meet Kabal.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?:
1.) At this point in the movie I don't really know what's going on. I don't think anyone knows what's going on in this movie. But its weird. Mordrid steps into some mystical portal to visit a castle floating in the sky in what I assume is another dimension. When he arrives there he meets a medieval looking guard that apparently is an old friend of his. But the guy sounds like he's from friggin' Texas. I don't just mean his voice but the words he chooses! "Kick that sonafabitch in the ass" and "he's a real cosmic sonafabitch". Why does this guy talk like that?
2.) I find it amazing that the police can arrest Dr. Mordrid. If he's such a high falutin' magician why didn't he make them magically forget to arrest him? Why didn't he just vanish? He did when he first met Samantha and he didn't even have a reason to do it then! Of course he could just do what a mere mortal would have done..call a f***ing lawyer! The cops have absolutely nothing on him, except that he has a pendant that has the same symbol that the murdered girl, Irene, had tattooed on her! That's like the cops arresting me because I have a skull and crossbones pin on my leather jacket and they found a dead body with a skull and crossbones tattooed on it! It may look a little suspicious, but its not any real evidence! Where's F. Lee Bailey when you need him?
3.) What exactly was the point of Adrian's mission? Kabal makes him invulnerable for twelve hours and the only thing he really does is get arrested and kicked in the balls by Samantha! If his mission was to kill Mordrid why didn't he just do that when he ran into him at the police station?
4.) Adrian doesn't seem like a rocket scientist. But I'd still he'd have asked where Irene was. Kabal killed her (and there's no real reason given for that...maybe he was trying to set Mordrid up for the murder, but there's no dialogue or anything to indicate that.) Irene was his girlfriend...didn't he care about her a teensy weensy bit? At least enough to ask Kabal "Hey, dude, did you, like, kill my chick?"
NUDITY AND SEX: Irene is in the buff and Kabal foolishly kills her.
HUH?: Okay, who or what exactly is Mordrid? He's a sorcerer from another dimension. That's all we know about him. Frankly the explanations given about his origins and Kabal's are rather weak. They don't answer anything. Who is the Monitor? All we find out is that he is Mordrid's boss and he has two big eyes that float in space.
Here's a remedy for Mordrid's problem of defending the Earth from Kabal and his legion of demons. Since Kabal needs a bunch of stuff and the Philosopher's stone to free the demon, why doesn't Mordrid just steal it and hide it away in his floating, magic interdimensional castle? Gee, what an idea!
When Kabal arrives at the museum its just before closing. The security guards are ushering people out and one of them tells Kabal its time to leave. Kabal doesn't move, and the guards usher the other people out. Without asking Kabal why he's not leaving. They leave and he's still in there! What kind of guards are these? Its a wonder this museum has anything in it with these retards guarding it!
The museum is pretty small. The Philosopher's stone is in the same room as the dinosaurs!
THE TALLY: Its a shame because I've seen some piss poor Full Moon pictures before but they were at least entertaining. This one falls flat. Flatter than Aunt Jemimas pancakes. Largely a boring endeavor, Dr. Mordrid will cast a spell on you...a spell of wishing you had rented something else!