Killer Workout
THE STORY: The first thing that happens in this flick is a woman named Valerie gets some good news about her modeling career. She gets into a tanning bed and it promptly roasts her to a crisp.
Next thing we see we're in "Rhonda's Workout", a fitness spa. This is the 80's so all the women have leg warmers on and theres this awful soundtrack. A girl named Rachel is murdered in the locker room of the spa, and in the next few days several other people are killed in the spa. Chuck Dawson, a private investigator begins working there undercover to try and find out who the killer is. Police Detective Morgan is also on the case too. Rhonda, the co-owner, isn't too crazy about Morgan and doesn't seem to be keen on Dawson, even though she doesn't know he's a PI. The killings keep going and Dawson is convinced its the work of Jimmy Hallock, a member of the spa. Dawson finds a bunch of pictures of Rhonda in Jimmy's apartment and goes to warn Rhonda about it. He finds Jimmy outside of her house and they get in a fight. Jimmy wins and runs away. Det. Morgan is on the lookout for Jimmy now but tells Dawson to get out of town now that he knows he's a PI. The next day Jimmy kills Dawson. Morgan however goes over to Rhonda's house and arrests her. He finds out that Rhonda Johnson used to Valerie Johnson...the model that got burnt to a crispy crunch in the tanning bed. He surmises that she has been killing the spa members because she's jealous of their beautiful bodies now that she's disfigured. (Rhonda wears a wig and clothing that disguises her burnt flesh.) He can't prove it though, and Rhonda goes free. She changed her name legally and all the evidence points to Jimmy. Jimmy shows up at the spa one night when Rhonda is in there alone. Jimmy admits that he knows she did the killings but he has been killing others in order to make the cops blame him. He's in love with Rhonda and doesn't want her to be caught. She kills him. Jimmy is blamed for the crimes and Rhonda is considered a hero for killing him. Morgan decides to kill Rhonda himself. Rhonda gets him first though. Now her spa is very popular and she's the heroinne of all the members...
BEST LINES: "Just teach the class and stop showing off your tits and your tight little ass!"-Rhonda to Jaime the aerobics instructor.
"You get over to the lab and tell that college boy if he doesn't have that report ready in 30 minutes I'm gonna come over there and do an autopsy on his face!" -Detective Morgan gets impatient over the police radio.
"I wanna know what the hell you're doing about this! Because I don't see you doing anymore than standing around acting like some goddamn TV cop!" -Rhonda to Detective Morgan.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?:
1.) Rhonda is one cold bitch. someone was just killed in the spa and she's worried about business.
2.) Hold on a ding dang minute! There was murder in the spa less than a day ago and its open for business as usual the next morning?
3.) Jimmy's face is priceless when Dawson counter his punch. you can almost hear him thinking "Oh [unwrite]! This guy's pretty strong!"
4.) The killer's main weapon is a giant novelty baby pin. I'm not kidding.
5.) I know this wan't the effect that was intended but when Rhonda rips open her shirt to show Morgan her burnt body I laughed out loud.
6.) The entire scene with Dawson and Debbie has no meaning! The only pay off it had was to show Debbie in a bikini and that wasn't revealing at all! The least they could have done was shown more skin! What a rip!
NUDITY AND SEX: A few of the chicks show their boobies.
HUH?: When Morgan goes to Diane's house he bangs on the door screaming "Open up" repeatedly. This scares Diane into not opening the door even though the killer is in her house. Only after Diane is completely frightened does Morgan say "Its the police! Open up!" Dumbass cop...if he had identified himself as an officer first Diane may have opened the door. (and thus not get killed)
Morgan took a long time to figure out that Rhonda is, or was rather, Valerie Johnson. I could be wrong about this, but if Rhonda changed her name legally its a matter of public record. During the beginning of a the murder investigation wouldn't a routine background check show that? Think about it...even if Rhonda wasn't guilty, her history does make her suspect number one!
So, the killer's main weapon is a novelty baby pin...the kind people use for key chains? How do you kill someone with a giant babypin? It can be done, I'm sure, but people don't just die instantly from being stabbed with a giant baby pin.
How the hell does Tommy get killed? Det. Morgan just left the room 5 seconds ago! Theres a cop outside the door! How'd the killer get in there?
2 murders take place in the Gym with a cop present. Morgan left him there for protection! I'll bet that guy's evaluation report sucks.
Speaking of murders...at one point in this movie FOUR PEOPLE have been murdered inside it! How the hell does it stay open?
Jimmy was limping a few minutes ago, now he's running like Jesse Owens.
THE TALLY: With the exception of the 80's aerobic soundtrack this movie is rather painless. To be honest I kind of enjoyed it. Morgan is such a dullard. Not as much nudity as you may expect from it, and its obvious that Rhonda is the killer and Jimmy is just an idiot covering for her.