METAMORPHOSIS: THE ALIEN FACTOR

THE STORY: Dr. Michael Foster, a scientist employed by the Talos corporation is bitten by a small extraterrestrial monster. This causes him to mutate into an unspeakable horror. His girlfriend, Dr. Nancy Kane and Dr. Elliot Stein try to cure him despite the reservations of Talos' evil CEO Dr. Vallini. Stein figures out a way to cure Foster using a particle accelerator, but the night before they attempt the cure, Foster breaks free and kills Stein and a security guard, John Griffin. Griffin's two daughters, Kim and Shari along with their friend Brian sneak into Talos the next day to find out what happened to John Griffin. Dr. Vallini hires two mercenaries, Mitchell and Jarrett to kill the mutated Foster. Foster kills practically everyone except Mitchell, Kim and Shari, who manage to lure him into the particle accelerator and destroy him. But the original monster from space is still loose.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?:

1.) The monsters in Fosters lab look a whole lot like muppets.

2.) Foster gets bitten trying to get a sample from the alien thingie. He's got his hands in the cage with only latex gloves on. This guy is a genetic researcher? The alien has some wicked teeth. A sane person would not have put their hands in there!

3.) Dr. Stein has medical supplies in a toolbox!

4.) While foster is mutating and little blobs with teeth shoot out of his body. Later on Dr. Stein is sitting next to his bed. He's pretty relaxed for a man sitting next to a guy who's turned into an alien monster that spits out blobs with teeth! C'mon, no one would sit calmly like that next to this dude!

5.) Speaking of the alien blobs with teeth, Dr. Kane comments on how they have a 'stinger' with poison, but every time someone gets hit with one it doesn't seem to do more than hurt a little.

6.) Stein figures out how to cure Foster with an atom smasher that's no bigger than a small microwave. Wow.

NUDITY AND SEX: None, but Kim is kinda cute.

HUH?: Jarrett and Mitchell catch Brian and Shari sneaking around Vallini's office and beat the crap out of Brian. Its pretty funny. But a few minutes later Brian jumps Jarrett from behind when he's slapping the piss out of Shari. What a sucky mercenary! Jarrett hit Brian about two dozen times and he didn't knock this nerdy guy out?

The monster is pretty [unwrite]in' huge. NO ONE saw this thing all day? Its way too big to hide somewhere. Doesn't anyone else work in this place?

THE TALLY: All in all, this flick wasn't scary, the monster looked pretty lame and the characters were pretty silly. Which is too bad. it should have been much funnier (cheese-wise) for such a lame flick.