Mary Shelley's

Frankenstein

THE STORY: A lot of people don't like this movie. I'm not one of them. I watched this movie the day before Halloween and on TV that night the old black and white version was on. Uh...the black and white version was kind of stupid. I'm sure it was frightening in 19 whenever-the-[unwrite], but it was hardly true to Mary Shelley's book. Granted, I never read the book, but you can read the cliff notes and know that it wasn't. This movie may have been over-the-top in some places, but I thought it was a decent flick.

In the beginning we meet Captain Walton, a sailor, who with his crew are trying to find a route to the north pole. The crew are scared and want to turn back, but Walton is obsessed. His ship runs aground of an iceberg and there they see a figure coming at them through the snowy mist. Its Victor Frankenstein. There's also an inhuman howling. Frankenstein tells Captain Walton that he has been hunting a monster. He begins his tragic tale....

Victor Frankenstein lives in Geneva in the 18th century. He wants to be a great doctor like his father and he has a great life! He's in a well-to-do family, his father is a great doctor, his mom is pretty cool and he has an adopted sister, Elizabeth, whom he fell in love with. There's also Mrs. Moritz and her daughter, Justine, the family's servants. Victor's downfall begins when his mother dies giving birth to his younger brother, Willie. Victor decides that he must defeat death! That he must find a way to bring the dead back to life!

Frankenstein goes away to some university to study his doctoring. He meets Henry, who turns out to be a good friend in time, and Prof. Waldeman. Waldeman, too, dabbled in finding the secret of life, but was arrested and punished for it. Still, Frankenstein befriends him and works with him in his research. But Waldeman draws the line when Frankenstein wants to reanimate the dead.

A cholera epidemic runs through the town and a Waldeman is killed while trying to vaccinate a citizen. This leaves Frankenstein free to pilfer Waldeman's secret notes and devise a way to bring the dead back to life. In secret he works on this. Meanwhile in Geneva, Elizabeth worries about him. She hasn't heard from him for months and with Justine's urging goes to the university to find out what has happened to her beloved. (They are to be married when Frankenstein graduates....well, she's not really his sister, being adopted)

Henry and Elizabeth fail to get Frankenstein to leave the city before it is quarantined. Frankenstein uses stolen body parts to stitch together a "man" and uses his elaborate equipment to bring it to life. But when the monster awakens it is almost insensate. Disappointed, Frankenstein abandons it and passes out from what we learn later is Pneumonia. Henry and Elizabeth didn't leave the city and find him the next day, sick and unconscious. Henry tells him that the epidemic is serious and killing people by the dozens....especially the newborn. This relieves Frankenstein to a point...his creation escaped during the night! Frankenstein hopes that it succumbed to cholera and died. He doesn't tell Henry this, but you know that's how he feels. Unbeknownst to him, the monster took his coat that had his journal of the experiment in the pocket!

While Frankenstein takes Henry as partner in his practice (that he is inheriting from his father) and arranges to be married to Elizabeth, the monster is tormented on the street by peasants. His hideously scarred appearance causes fear and loathing and after fighting a crowd of unruly villagers determined to do him in, the monster flees into the woods. There he hides in the barn of a poor family. The family has a hard time harvesting their crops so the monster in secret goes to the fields at night and helps out. He eats from the slop that they feed the pigs and learns to read and talk by spying on them. The family has an elderly grandfather that is blind. He tells the two children that the mysterious helper is the good spirit of the forest, but he knows something, or someone is out there. The monster makes his presence known when the grandfather and the young daughter are in the home are alone and the landlord assaults him. The monster uses his superhuman strength to kill the man. The grandfather befriends the monster, but this lasts only a few minutes. The other members of the family return and attack the monster. More from being emotionally hurt rather than physically, the monster runs into the woods. But he returns a short while later and discovers the family has vacated the premises. Its all because they are afraid of him and his hideous appearance! Heartbroken, the monster begins reading the journal of Frankenstein which was in his coat pocket. He learns the horrible truth of his creation and in a rage decides that the cause for his misery is Frankenstein! He vows to have revenge and sets off for Geneva!

Once he arrives the monster doesn't [unwrite] around. He kills Willie, Frankenstein's young brother, and makes it look like Justine did it. Justine is hung by a mob. Then the monster confronts Frankenstein. Arranging to meet him on a mountaintop, the monster tells him that if Frankenstein will create a female creature he will leave him alone....but if Frankenstein refuses he will basically kill everyone that Frankenstein cares about. At first Frankenstein agrees, but when the monster delivers Justine's body to him, Frankenstein refuses. The monster then vows that if he is denied his wedding night he will deny Frankenstein his.

You know, Frankenstein should have listened to him. The monster was more than capable of killing him right then, but he obviously had a better and more vicious way to get his revenge...by killing everyone around Frankenstein. The monster is obviously intelligent, and a lot faster and stronger than a normal person. Hell, I'd have done it. But Frankenstein doesn't, so the monster kills his elderly father and even though Frankenstein plans to run away and hide with his new wife, Elizabeth, the monster manages to find them and literally rip her heart out of her chest.

Frankenstein then feels he has nothing to lose. Using Justine's body he attaches Elizabeth's head and brings her back to life. But the monster arrives in the lab and demands that Frankenstein give her to him. Elizabeth, dazed but aware what has happened sets herself on fire and burns the mansion (and her body) to a crispy crunch. From that point on, Frankenstien has pursued the monster north intent to destroy him.

With his tale told to Captain Walton, Frankenstein expires from exhaustion. The Monster arrives and that allays all of Walton's disbelief of the story. The captain and his crew build a funeral pyre for Frankenstein but before it can be lit the iceberg breaks apart. The crew hurries to the ship but the monster swims to the chunk of ice with Frankenstein's body on it. Walton tells the monster to come with them, but the monster tells him he is "done with man!" With Frankenstein dead, he has no purpose. So he lights the pyre and stays on the ice chunk with Frankenstein's body, burning himself and ending his miserable, lonely existence. Seeing what obsession has done to one man, and how many lives it cost, Walton orders his crew to turn back.

Having not read the actual book I can only hope that this movie was more or less based on it. I enjoyed it. Its certainly better than the old flat headed "Herman Munster" type Frankenstein movies. I was never really scared of that version. He was slow, stupid and couldn't talk. This monster was smart, fast and crafty. Infinitely more dangerous if aroused. The Monster was played by Robert De Niro. I think he did a good job. Frankenstein was Kenneth Branagh. A lot of people refer to Branagh as a creative jackass. I have never had a problem with him....but then I know little of him. He may be a jackass....but he is talented. I won't fault the man for being a jackass because he has entertained me and you can tell he has passion for his work. You want a talented jackass look at Dennis Rodman. I don't even like basketball, but I wish Rodman would go the [unwrite] away. The only problem I had with Branagh in this movie was the fact that he plays a lot of scenes in his lab shirtless. Like he's saying "Hey, look at my hunky body". I hope that's not what he thought. He ain't all that cut. I'm pretty sure I could kick his ass. Waldeman was Ex-Monty Python great, John Cleese. Henry was Tom Hulce who was Mozart in the great flick Amadeus and of course he was in Animal House. Elizabeth was Helena Bonham Carter. I don't remember seeing her before but she's cute. Captain Walton was actor Aidan Quinn.

Best Lines: "The sea of ice...I will meet you there, on the sea of ice!"-  the monster arranges a meeting with Frankenstein.

"I do know that for the sympathy of one living being I would make peace with all. I have love in me the likes of which you would scarcely imagine...and rage, the likes of which you would not believe. If can not satisfy the one I will indulge the other."- the monster tries to extort a bride out of Frankenstein.

"I keep my promises!!"- the monster rips out Elizabeth's heart and shows it to Frankenstien!

1.) Exactly how easy were electric eels to come by in 18th century Europe? Without checking I'm fairly certain that they weren't of abundance. I'm not saying that Frankenstein couldn't have gotten a bunch of them, but its a little dubious. Plus, what kind of food and needs do electric eels have? Was that in abundance too? Especially in a city where a cholera plague is in effect?

2.) Was this elaborate pulley system really needed to put the body into the vat? I mean, Frankenstein has this bigass setup of chains and pulleys that lowers the body into his little tub of horrors, but why? A table with wheels could have served the same purpose!

3.) How did the monster know the picture in the locket was Frankenstein? When young Willie drops it and the monster looks at it he immediately growls "Frankenstein!". But how does he know the picture is Frankenstein? Its not like they had polaroids back then. I suppose the monster could have a distant memory of its creation, but its not explained.

4.) You know, if I were Frankenstein I'd NEVER go all the way up that big [unwrite]ing mountain to meet with the monster. Now, I can dig it that the monster probably wanted a meeting place where Frankenstein couldn't easily bring a posse...but If I were Frankenstein I'd have suggested a place closer and promised not to bring anyone else. If the monster did plan on killing him then he would have been up [unwrite] Creek. Funk dat!

5.) After a time the monster's scars of where he was stitched together seem to heal a little. To be honest, he's less grotesque and more of a really big ugly guy. Now, considering the fact that there had to have been a lot of big ugly guys in 18th century Europe, I wonder why he just didn't decide to find a city or village somewhere and well, live. Yeah, he was still no model, but he could have passed for a normal, although a pretty [unwrite]in' ugly dude. With the added bonus of being ridiculously strong, he could have found work I'm sure. A guy that can lift a freaking horse can find a job.

6.) Castle Frankenstein must have been soaked in Gasoline! When Frankenstein reanimates Elizabeth and she goes nuts setting herself afire, she runs through the hallways and everything she touches bursts into flames! Geez! It'd be safer to live in a cave rather than this mansion! It went up like an ammo dump! I don't know much about construction let alone construction 200 years ago, but since the only light would be from a candle you'd think the place would be a little less flammable. Or maybe they had killer home-owner insurance back then.

7.) Speaking of Castle Frankenstein, what the hell is up with that giant ass staircase? Man, if I was mega rich and could afford a giant mansion like that I still wouldn't want a freaking huge ass staircase like that. Just going to bed must have been like the Bataan Death March! Think about it...if you got dressed to go out walked down this humongous staircase and then remembered you left your wallet on the night stand! Man! That would [unwrite]ing suck!

NUDITY AND SEX:  none

HUH? : Frankenstein's change of heart is kind of abrupt. After he brings the monster to life he immediately is disappointed in the results and decides that the monster and his journal must be destroyed. Well, what did he expect? Did he think that the creature would just sit up and start reciting Shakespeare? Plus, he doesn't even give the creature a chance. He decides right then "Okay, this was a [unwrite]ed up idea. I'll just trash the whole thing and pretend it never happened." Of course that's what leads the monster to his thirst for revenge, but still you'd think such a high minded individual wouldn't give up on an experiment so quickly.

Frankenstein refuses to use Justine's body as a bride for the monster. Uh, why? I am not saying it would be easy or even moral. As a matter of fact it would be sick. But he's already "Tampered in God's domain." I'd just do it and hope that with a lot of prayer I could escape hell. It would end the monster's reign of terror and that is the result of Frankenstein's lust for knowledge.

Just to get the idea on how things have changed since the 18th century, I have an adopted little sister....I think she's a good looking woman now...but I would NEVER EVER CONSIDER MARRYING HER! God, that is so sick! I can also add this....I love my wife dearly, but if she was killed bringing her back from the dead wouldn't be an option. When has anyone in any movie done that and not suffered terribly for it? My life would suck without her, but it would suck even worse with a zombified version of her.

THE TALLY: No [unwrite], people, this is a good movie. Its not a gore fest, even though some have said it was needlessly gory. PFAH! There really isn't that much gore. Its entertaining and interesting to watch. Hey, if you're in the mood for a few Frankenstein flicks pick this one up and compare it to the others. I think you'll be a little suprised.