THE STORY: Years ago...it seems like a century, when I was a mere college student, one of my roommates bought home a tape. It was the original Night of the Living Dead. It scared the living [unwrite] out of me. It was a really scary, creepy movie...especially for a chicken like me. But I can't find the original around here. Luckily, though, i can find the 90's remake of it!

Is there anyone who doesn't know the basic story of this movie? For some unknown reason, the recently dead rise and walk. But they aren't human anymore. They're cannibilistic, evil, slow moving zombies. The really scary thing about the living dead isn't that they're dead. Its that they can't be killed. Um....oh...wait...I guess thats 'cuz they're dead, huh? Okay, well, they're scary anyway. Face it, a dead guy, that looks like a rotting corpse isn't too scary for a horror fan...Especially if he's slow. But when a whole bunch of dead guys come at you, thats scary! When a whole bunch of dead guys that want to just freaking eat you show up, its real scary. The dead aren't like ghosts of the people they were. They're flesh eating zombies with no morals.

When the dead do rise, Barbara, a normal, kind of prissy woman is visiting her mothers grave with her brother, Johnny. The undead attack and ruin this for her. Johnny gets killed and Barbara barely makes it away to a nearby farmhouse. Now Barbara is really scared at this time. After all a bunch of dead people just tried to kill her. Luckily for her, Ben shows up. Ben, is the "Hero" of this movie. He's smart, he's kind of kick-ass and he;'s definitely determined to make it out of this film alive. Barb and Ben discover that people are hiding in the basement of the house. The Coopers and Tommy and Judie Rose. The Cooper family is comprised of the dad, Harry, the mom, Helen and the daughter Sara. Sara is sick and dying. Harry is the biggest asshole on the continent. Tommy and Judie Rose are two hicks. The house actually belongs to Tommy's unlce who died and was zombified. Barbara had to kill him again.

This is where the real horror begins. Its not so much that the dead are walking and trying to get into the house. Its the tension inside. Ben is trying to be the leader and so is Cooper. The two men hate each other instantly, and won't work together. Cooper wnats everyone to hole up in the basement and Ben thinks its better to not be cornered and make a stand where they are. Meanwhile the dead don't care about a damn thing but eating the people in the house. hye say hell is being trapped in a room with your friends. Well, hell is also being trapped in a house with these guys.

Clearly, cooper is the "Bad Guy". He's obnoxious and a real jerk too. But Ben isn't too much better. Yeah, Ben has balls and he's trying to save everyone but he's so surte he;s right he doesn't even consider Barbara's idea of making a run for it. Which as it tuerns out was right! Ben and the others (minus the Coopers) have the idea that if they can get some gas for the truck outside they can escape the dead schmucks coming to the house. A sound idea, since tommy's unlce has gas pumps on the property. only the pumps are locked and Tommy has no ideas where the keys are. They do find some jeys but they ain't the right ones. This results in Tommy doing something stupid to the pumps and blasting himslef and Judie rose to charcoal briquettes.

Ben and Cooper have a shootout when Cooper's skunk like colors become evident, and both men are wounded. Cooper runs to the attic of the house, while Ben urges Barabar to run for it and get help. He's too hurt to go from Cooper's gunshot and the living dead are stornming the house. Barbara does run for it and she makes it to help. Wierd help.

since the netire world is being plagued by the living dead, its almost total anarchy. Good Ol' boys are hunting the dead as sport. I'm sure theres some kind of social commentary involved in all of this, but I don't get it. I didn't try too hard to get it either. Barbar and a band of Dead Guy Hunters return to the house, but all of her friends are dead. Including Ben. Ben has become one of the living dead and has to be put down. But then barbar finds Cooper. Cooper is alive and well, but only until Barbar vlows his weasely head off. As the movie ends, Barbara looks at the assembled masses and laments on how the living are no better than the dead.

I cna't describe this movie well enough. Its really a great piece of horror. The original movie was fantastic, and if you want to read about it heres a link to Liz's reviw of it at her site, And You Call Yourself a Scientist. To be honest i wanted to review this movie for awhile but put it off...only Liz's snap judgement review of it compelled me to get it over with. I won't try and describe anymore, i'll just tell you to watch it. (The original if you can find it, or this one if you can't)

Patricia tallman was Barbara. Sci Fi fans will know her from Babylon Five where she played a telepath. I think Patricia is a really beautiful lady and a good actress. Another sci-fi recognizable is Ben. He was Tony Todd, also known as worf's brother Kurn on Star Trek: the Next generation and Deep Space Nine. Todd is also Candyman. He's fun to see in any movie!

Best Lines: "What in the name of Jupiter's Balls are you doin' out here alone, little lady?"- A redneck dude when they almost shoot barbara thinking she's one of the living dead.

1.)  Barbara hits the nail on the head when she says "They're so slow. we could just walk past them!". The living dead are extremely slow. Ben says that they aren't even that strong. If I was there I'd take one of the guns, some ammo and maybe enough food and water to sustain myself for awhile and go seek civilization...but that's me, with military training. But even without that training common sense kind of leans towards the thought that the house isn't safe. There are an almost limitless supply of the undead and trying to defend the house against them is a losing deal. Since they can't move fast I think keeping on the move would be a really smart move.

2.)  Cooper is the official Big Dumb Jerk for this movie, though that will have to be modified to the Weasley Little Creep. Even if he feels he's right in hiding in the basement, his utter refusal to cooperate with Ben and the others is almost impossible to believe! When Ben says they may need to keep the basement as a fall back position, Cooper says something along the lines "Oh, you want the best of both worlds." What a jackass. Ben must be a really even tempered dude. Seeing what an asshole Cooper was i'd have beat the [unwrite] out of him from the start. In that situation, with those people...it'd be my way or the highway. A team needs a leader and Cooper sure wouldn't get my vote. Since Cooper wouldn't go quietly he'd have to get his clock cleaned.

3.)  The king-Boffo-Ultimate-of-Stupid-ideas belongs to Tom. Picture this...trying to get gas from a locked fuel pump. with an open flame five feet away...and he attepts to shoot the lock off of the pump? Thats so stupid even I couldn't believe it the first time i saw it!

4.)  I know it didn't turn out this way, but if I were Ben and I had in any way gotten the upper hand after Cooper refused to let him back into the house, Cooper would have caught the the Alpha of all ass-whoopings. I'm talking the beat you within an inch of your life, Worthy of Kings, Make You Swear To God You Wish You Had Never Been Born Smackdowns! (Beee-yitch!!!) Why Ben left Barbara alone to deal with this dickhead is a mystery. Cooper's a liability. He's treachorous and selfish. If Ben had left judie Rose with Barbara tragedy might have been averted.

NUDITY AND SEX:  none

HUH? : After Barbara kills the undead Mr. MacGruder, judie Rose screams "You killed Mr. MacGruder!" several times as if Barbara had committed a cold blooded murder for no reason. What the [unwrite] has this girl been thinking? Did she think they woere boarding up the windows for fun? It was obvious that MacGruder wasn't alive in the first place. Get a clue, girlfriend.

Barbara's transformation into a killing machien is kid of abrupt. She blows cooper's brain's out without a blink of the eye. One night of sheer, utter terror turned her into Xena!

The end of the movie is a bit disappointing. I don't think people would react this way to the walking dead, even in West virginia or any other Trailer trash Hellhole you care to mention. irst of all, its unbelievable that Death Sport rodeos would be held...Come on...the dead are Walking! People would freak the [unwrite] out! Secondly, how'd all of these rednecks get high powered weapons and ammo? Are all hicks so well armed? I don't see it, not without some kind of military presence trying to take control before anarachy breaks out.

THE TALLY:  If you are a real horror fan you'll rent this. If not you won't. But if you want a good horror movie this is uyour badboy right here.