Skinheads:

The Second coming of Hate

THE STORY: Just so you'll know, I think skinheads and neo nazis are sick. I am also fascinated in a sick kind of way by the sheer hatred they have for those that aren't like them. The world is full of many different people with many different beliefs and philosophies, but their kind of ideas we could all do without. I hate racists.

But, this isn't a site about philosophy and race-relations. Its about movies....cheesy movies...movies that have to be judged by the Inferno! And I've been waiting to judge this one for some time. Oh, yes, I've sat here in my super secret dark little cubbyhole many nights awaiting for the day when I would submit this movie to the Inferno! I've seen it before, but too long ago to make an accurate judgement of it....and the only copy at my local video store disappeared. So this flick escaped judgement for a long time...until my friend Greywizard, the wise and powerful master of the Unknown Movies was kind enough to send me a copy. Muhahahahaha! Skinheads: the Second Coming of Hate must now face Dante's Inferno!

You would be shocked to learn that this movie is no where near as thrilling as the title would let you believe. The skinheads in this movie wouldn't frighten me if I ran into them in a dark alley. They're remarkably stupid and any person with an ounce of sense could outsmart them. But in the alternate universe this movie is coming from, they are portrayed as as being "dangerous". Our tale begins as an elderly Jewish couple open their corner store for the day. they are greeted by a young black kid that they know and all seems right in the world. The old man and the boy discuss baseball, the woman asks the young black kid how his parents are doing....ah, isn't it grand, that people from such different backgrounds can be so close?

This wonderful morning doesn't last long though. A gang of Skinheads, led by Damon comes into the store and promptly begin robbing it. They beat the kid up for being black and injure the old man...all the time Damon spouts pro-nazi and anti-Jewish sentiments. But the kid escapes and goes to get some "homeboys". Soon a gang of black men are there to do battle with the skinheads. A fight ensues....a badly choreographed fight, I might add, which leads to the skinheads fleeing back to their hideout.

After awhile the skinheads decide they should leave town for awhile until the "Heat dies down". You know, if these assholes had jobs they wouldn't have had to rob a store (and I don't know why they robbed the store anyway) and this wouldn't be happening. So they all hop into the Death Van and head out of town. Meanwhile at a roadside diner in the mountains outside of Reno, a man named Huston is saying goodbye to Martha, the owner of the diner. Huston is a loner and wants to go back to his cabin. His girlfriend Martha has to get ready for customers. The first customers are Amy and Carla two young women on a hiking and biking trip. Then Jeff, a college student and his friend Tiny and Some Other Guy show up. Jeff wants to gas up and go, (Martha's diner sells gas too) but Tiny and some other guy want to eat. Martha asks Jeff if he can fix her stove, while Tiny and Some Other Guy get cozy with Amy and Carla. Then the skinheads show up.

The skinheads don't take kindly to the fact that Tiny is black and soon Tiny is forced to fight the biggest skinhead, a dolt named Brains. Brains is retarded (!) and Tiny has no problem beating him. But Damon shoots tiny and the gang begins to rape Carla. Meanwhile the skinheads have knocked Jeff out. Jeff comes to and realizes what is happening. One of the skinheads has cut the phone line, and when Jeff tries to fix it he is seen. He runs for it and takes Amy with him. The skinheads kill Martha (They've already killed some other Guy and Carla) and pursue them. Jeff wrecks his car and he and Amy escape into the forest. The skinheads chase them. Eventually, and I mean after a day or so of the skinheads chasing them through the woods, Amy and Jeff find a cabin belonging to Huston. Huston hears their story and tries to take them to the authorities, but the skinheads attack and force them to retreat to the cabin. Huston is wounded by a gunshot to the arm. The skinheads make it into the cabin after an overnight siege that is not very exciting. Jeff has set a trap for them though. Damon shoots one of his followers for questioning him and shoots Huston, but Huston ignites Jeff's gunpowder trap before he dies....a flash temporarily blinds the skinheads while Jeff and Amy escape into the forest again. They don't get far when Amy twists her ankle. (Yeah, right). Jeff hides her in a tree and goes back to kill the skinheads. By this time there are only a few left. Huston killed one of them the day before and Damon kills any of them that question him. Jeff succeeds in killing two of the skinheads, leaving only Damon and the girl skinhead. Damon finds where Amy is hiding and rapes her. Then he goes to find Jeff, whom he keeps calling "The hero". The skinhead chick is kind of nutty and fights Amy. In the fight the skinhead chick stabs herself and dies. Jeff and Amy make it to a road and try to flag down a car, but Damon, who must have stolen it in a scene we don't see, comes barreling down the road at them. Damon crashes and Jeff decides its time to finish this. He and Damon fight but Amy finds Damon's gun and shoots him. The end.

This movie was written by a ten year old! It sure as hell seems that way! the characters, their actions, the entire movie is like that! Simple. I get the idea that this is a first draft of an idea for a movie that somehow got made into the movie! There's no real tension at all. The people are all cardboard cutouts, especially the skinheads. But its fun to watch in a bad movie kind of way. You really have to watch it to appreciate how bad it really is. I'm betting you'll agree with me about the ten year old writing it! If you want to see a movie about skinheads that's pretty good see "Romper Stomper". Its a foreign movie and at least the characters have motivations and personalities. This movie is one for those of us who are looking for something to make fun of. Martha was played by Barbara Bain. Bain was on the TV show Mission Impossible (my wife tells me....I never watched that show) and also starred in the show Space:1999. Huston was played by the late actor Chuck Connors. He was the Rifleman in that old western show. Brian Brophy played Damon. Brophy was also Commander Bruce Maddox in the episode "The Measure of a Man" on the TV show Star Trek: The Next Generation! Amy was played by Elizabeth Sagal...in the 80's Sagal and her twin sister had a short lived sitcom called "Double Trouble". Sagal is also the sister to Katey Sagal who played Peg Bundy on Married With Children. Katey Sagal is also the voice of Leela on the animated show Futurama.

Best Lines: "You poor idiot...you wiped yourself with poison ivy."- Damon to the really dumb Skinhead, Brains. Brains took a dump in the woods and wiped his ass with....well, poison ivy.

"Nazis....I still can't believe it!"-Huston says this a lot after Jeff and Amy explain that skinheads are after them.

1.) When the skinheads and the black gang get into a fight outside the corner store, the fight is remarkably lame! Plus, Damon, the skinhead leader shot one of the black guys. The black guy is still fighting. Now, I've never been shot, but I was under the impression that a gunshot to the stomach area was really painful. I don't know if I or anyone else COULD get up and fight after being shot like that.

2.) The skinheads plan is to get out of town until the heat dies down from their little robbery. Um, how long have they been formulating this plan? They're all hanging out in what I assume is Damon's home and the "Lets get out of dodge" plan seems to be an afterthought. How can the police NOT catch them? They've just committed an armed robbery! With no masks and in an easily identifiable white van with a huge ass swastika painted on it! Are the police that ineffectual that they can't locate these bozos? To make it even worse, what's the first thing the skinheads do when they get out of town to escape capture? They start a brawl and shoot someone else at the first diner they see! (killing about four people!) This is lying low 'til the heats off?

3.) This chick Amy is pretty nasty to Jeff while they're trying to outrun the skinheads in the woods. She wants to read him the riot act when he says he doesn't care about politics. Is she out of her [unwrite]ing mind? They've got a bunch of murdering skinheads chasing them! I wouldn't care if Jeff said he hated all politicians, was an atheist, a communist and that he wears girls underwear! Lest Amy forgets Jeff did save her life! If I was him I'd have to say "Look, bitch, I didn't have to risk my ass to save you from those neo-nazi misanthropes! I could have kept going and been home free so cut me a little slack!".

4.) When Damon fights his former follower Jerry, he headbutts this guy continuously about ten times! No freakin' way! Ever head butt anyone? It hurts! You just can't fight someone and win by constantly using your head as a blunt object! (Well, maybe skinheads can....there can't be much under the skull to protect anyway!)

5.) Jeff, who we are led to believe by dialogue knows very little about the forest, hiking or camping. Yet, he snatches a rattlesnake off of the ground without being bitten! how many people can actually do that? I've been hiking, camping and all that good stuff, I've seen scorpions, snakes and weird spiders....but I know I couldn't just grab a rattlesnake without being bitten! Jeff gets mad and all of a sudden he's [unwrite]ing Grizzly Addams!

NUDITY AND SEX: Carla's boobs are seen.

HUH?: That little flesh wound that Huston has on his arm caused him to lose so much blood he's almost completely incapacitated? BULL[unwrite]!

Hitler and the Nazis weren't too pleased with the mentally handicapped. In fact they wanted to exterminate them as well as the Jews. So how the hell does Brains fit in with Damon and and his skinhead gang? This guy has the brain capacity of a six year old! No, scratch that....I've met six year olds that were a lot smarter than he is....Brains is obviously severely short in the old think tank department! Why do the skinheads tolerate him?

When Jeff and his friends first arrive at Martha's Diner, Martha asks one of them if they can help fix her "cook-stove". Um, does this seem like a smart thing to do? If you owned a diner would you want a complete stranger working on your GAS stove? For all she knows, Jeff could be a complete idiot! Its not like Martha had to get that stove working right away. She only had about five customers and it didn't look like a big rush of people were due any time soon! (I admit, There's no dialogue to indicate that its a gas stove, but that seems to be the first choice of what it is...and even if its not, does that make much of a difference? I'm not a stupid person, but would you let me fix your electric stove? I think not.)

So, what would you do if skinheads were chasing you and a friend through the wilderness for a day or so and you found a cabin...a cabin that is occupied by someone but they aren't home. Of course if you were wise you'd get some food and look for weapons. But would you decide to GO TO [unwrite]ING SLEEP!? That's what Jeff and Amy do after they find Huston's cabin! Are they mad? Time enough for rest in the grave! I'd either get what I could and keep moving or start preparing to make a stand there. (Actually, being an army guy if I found some weapons like they did and knowing the skinheads at this point have ONE pistol, I'd go out looking for them....but since Jeff has had no combat training I didn't expect him to do this)

THE TALLY: I have said this before and I'll say it again....movies are judged on many things, but one main component is its entertainment value. This movie was bad....really [unwrite]in' stupid....but it was entertaining. I laughed my ass off the first time I saw it and its not a comedy. so even though the movie was, well, to be kind, STUPID....it was fun to watch. If you like bad movies you should rent this. You'll laugh. Trust the Inferno. But if you want a second opinion check out Greywizard's review. By pure happenstance we posted our reviews of this movie at the same time.