THE STORY: In the first Species movie, scientists had used information transmitted by an alien intelligence to create an alien/ human hybrid. The alien, named Sil, was to be terminated because if she was ever able to breed it would mean the end of our civilization. Sil breaks free and has to hunted down and exterminated by a special team picked by the government. This sequel is supposed to pick up from there, but doesn't quite do that.

Astronauts Patrick Ross, Gamble and Sampas return from the first manned mission to Mars. But something in the soil samples they take from the red planet infects them. This causes a three minute loss of time that they and NASA can't account for. Still, the astronauts are heroes, especially Ross. Ross was the mission commander and he's the son of a senator.

Alien DNA was in the Martian soil. Its the same alien DNA as from the first movie. Peter Boyle in a throwaway part explains how an alien civilization must have once lived on mars, yada, yada, yada. This part doesn't matter. Its just bits and pieces to glue a few parts together. Basically, Ross and Sampas are infected with the alien DNA. It drives Ross to screw as many hot women as he can. (except for the death thing this sounds like a damn good virus!) The women become instantly pregnant and give birth within minutes of orgasm. Ross then takes the offspring (These kids are born at about the age of ten! And most women say normal childbirth is painful!) to a farmhouse his family owns. Sampas, the female Mars mission member gives dies while giving birth to an alien after having sex with her husband. The alien baby is killed however because Press Lennox and Dr. Blake are on the case. They arrive in time to kill the alien but not save the Sampas'.

Yes, Press Lennox, ladies and gentlemen. When the authorities realize that the alien threat is back they get Lennox, the "best man for the job". Lennox was the leader of the team in the first movie. Dr. Blake was on the team also, but recently she's been working with fatass Colonel Burgess in creating Eve. Eve is an exact duplicate of Sil. She was grown from a frozen embryo of the alien mush, but given enough human DNA to keep her under control. The reasoning in creating her was to find out what can kill these aliens if we ever have to fight them. Lennox is pissed when he finds out that the government has created another hybrid and rightly so. Still, he works with Blake and after failing to save Sampas starts searching for Gamble. Gamble's DNA is tested and he's clear. It seems that the alien DNA cannot survive with any human DNA imperfections and Gamble has the gene (or whatever) that causes sickle cell anemia.

That leaves Ross as the obvious candidate for the dead, split wide open female bodies lying around the city. Gamble locates Ross first and discovers the awful truth. Then he teams up with Blake and Lennox to stop him before he breeds the world out of existence. After a few close calls and the like that a movie like this requires, Sil breaks free of her captivity. Driven by instinct to find and [unwrite] Ross she does exactly that. Telepathically linked to him somehow she drives directly to the secret farmhouse.Our heroes follow and use some kind of gas to kill the alien embryo children in the place. But Ross and Sil are already mating. With her last shred of humanity Sil tries to kill Ross, but gets killed herself. The now mutated Ross is ready to kick Lennox, Blake and Gamble's collective asses when Gamble has an idea. He tells Lennox to use his blood. Lennox stabs Gamble in the leg with a pitchfork and then stabs Ross. The sickle cell tainted blood kills the monster.

With the world safe the military begins shipping the bodies out of there. Only before the credits roll we see a stray cat and one of the alien children in the ambulance containing Sil's body.

HOW THE [unwrite] DID THEY GET IN THERE?! A cat? A child? no one is in the ambulance to guard the alien hybrid body? No one saw a cat, let alone a child get in? Oh lord, spare us from the horror that will be named Species 3!

This movie is one of the reasons I hate sequels to better movies. Species was no work of art, but at least it had the benefit of being a entertaining and good in that sci-fi cartoony kind of way. The only cast members that returned to the series are Michael Madsen as Lennox and Marg Helgenberger as Dr. Blake. James Cromwell (from "Babe" and "The General's Daughter") was Senator Ross. Oh, and Natasha Henstridge's gazongas. Lets face it folks, more people waited to see Henstridges boobies than they did to see Madsen play yet another tough guy.

Best Lines: "This isn't the [unwrite]ing X-files!"- Colonel Burgess about the alien situation.

"A brother just can't get no booty....know what I mean?"- Ugh. OKAY...we realize Gamble is the only black guy in the movie. You don't have to have him hammer us with ethnically-charged dialogue! I'm suprised they didn't ask him to rap his lines.

"Where's the God Damned Cereal!?"- Lennox pulls a gun on a supermarket clerk. Ross is in the store in the cereal aisle and Lennox wants him.

"I'm takin' this 'cuz I'm about to go back to Africa on somebody's ass!"- Gamble finds a machete to take with him on the alien hunt. Gamble's dialogue pissed me off, but this line did make me chuckle.

1.) NASA must really, really, really be broke! Why have the corporate logos Pepsi, Sprint, Reebok and Lite beer emblazoned on a spacecraft unless its to get some advertising revenue? Man, that looks so stupid. Who are they advertising to? Do they think some aliens will see this and stop by on earth to buy some new sneakers and drink cheap brewskis?

2.) The great movie tradition of people doing really stupid things continues. When the scientist analyzing the blood samples from the returning astronauts discovers something incredibly wrong with Ross's blood, a beaker full of it tips over and spills on the  floor. Now, from all accounts the beaker was tipped over by whatever alien crap was in the blood. The spilled blood then moves along the floor like a living organism while the scientist watches. So what does he do? He puts his hand in it!!! Why? If I saw spilled blood move on its own like that I sure as hell wouldn't touch it! [unwrite], if I saw a puddle of Passion fruit flavored Kool-Aid move on its own I'm leaving the area! What was this guy thinking? "That's strange....I think I'll [unwrite]ing touch it!"

Oh did I mention...a BEAKER full of Ross's blood! That's a helluva lotta blood! Geez, after giving that much blood Ross wouldn't be thinking about sex....he'd be thinking about eating and sleeping....a lot of sleeping!

3.) The two biggest cliches in this movie...1) A black man must act like a cool, hip, trash talking brother. Gamble does. This annoyed me a lot. He must be a pretty intelligent man. Astronauts have to be! He's a military officer. So he should have decorum. Yet in this movie he may as well be the brother you meet at the club, by his speech. That's ridiculous and a little insulting. 2) Hookers in the movies always look like models. When the alien-possessed Ross goes looking for some tail, he of course, picks up hookers. These hookers look gorgeous! The only good looking hookers I've ever seen are in the movies and Amsterdam! (Oops....I said too much! Honestly, I've never picked up a hooker, but  I've seen a lot of them.)

4.) I've asked this before and as long as there are b-movies I'll be asking....WHERE ARE THE [unwrite]ING COPS? Lennox and Gamble run into a supermarket on Ross' tail waving guns around. Ross has basically kidnapped a screaming woman and taken her to the parking lot. Yet no one else sees these events unfolding? No one has called the cops? NO WAY! This wasn't a corner deli or dimestore grocery market...it was a big ass mondo-supermarket (with split level parking! Now that's a SUPER market!) But the cops never arrive! Also....Lennox and Gamble accidentally interrupt two young people in a van screwing (if the vans a'rockin' don't come knockin'....) Why would they choose a heavily used parking lot to do this? I know this was meant to b humorous, but this movie has already stretched credibility...that's just kind of stupid. If I had owned a van in my younger days I can think of a plethora of locations I'd drive it to have sex...and none of them are in a supermarket parking lot during a busy day!

NUDITY AND SEX: This movies primary mission is to get male viewers by showing boobs. So there's a lot of gazongas seen and sex scenes.

HUH?: Who is this Colonel Burgess? Curly Joe's little brother? He's ridiculously fat....especially for a marine! I have NEVER seen a fat marine! Especially a fat marine officer! It just doesn't happen....not as fat as Burgess. If you tell him to haul ass he's gotta make two trips!

Senator Ross tells his son that there's no way he's going to let the military get their hands on him. By taking him to Johns Hopkins University and getting the best doctors, etc. This guy is a senator? I guess the idea that the government may be keeping tabs on him to see if Patrick gets in touch is unthinkable to him. Or the fact that "getting the best doctors" wouldn't attract the attention of those looking for Patrick. He even says the military wouldn't be able to find Patrick at the old farmhouse because its listed under his late mother's maiden name. Well, in this particular Movie Universe I guess not....but that only makes the movie dumber. Wouldn't the powers that be find out about that place? Wouldn't they at least post a lookout?

Eve breaks free of the compound but the soldiers outside gun her down the minute she exits the building. Her alien biology regenerates her within seconds and she runs again. The soldiers fire at her but they must be missing. Why can't they just shoot her down again before she escapes completely?

This is obvious, but I'll mention it anyway....isn't it mind bendingly idiotic that the government would create ANOTHER alien being capable of wiping out human life after the events in the first movie? Speaking of which, what happened to the alien that survived the first movie?

THE TALLY: You're not missing anything if you miss this movie. Hard core science fiction buffs may get a small amount of enjoyment out of it, but its not terribly original. its more like a watered down rehash of the original movie used as an excuse to show off Henstridge's body. Which I'll admit, is freaking spectacular.