THE STORY: Surface to Air doesn't make it that far off of the ground. It starts off okay, but doesn't go anywhere. This was a big disappointment to me...I was in the mood for a good action movie.

There are two half brothers...one, Lt. Dylan, is a navy pilot...the other, SGT Mason, is a marine. Keep in mind I'm not too sure of the names. It sounds like the characters are saying Madison instead of Mason, and the credits say Mason. The credits also list Chad McQueen as Lt. Dylan, even though I don't really understand how he can be named Dylan instead of Mason. Well, he could be, but its not made very clear and I gave up trying to figure it out.

The brothers are assigned to the same Aircraft carrier. They haven't spoken in ten years. Lt. Dylan is angry with his brother because he stole his high school sweetheart. SGT Mason just seems to be generally joyless. He's not to keen on seeing his brother or even being assigned to the Aircraft carrier. In his previous assignment at the Macedonian Embassy he was present at a terrorist attack. For some reason, Mason feels that this is the reason he's been transferred. His commander tells him that's not so, and indeed, there's nothing for him to worry about. But this self doubt isn't explored. It just makes Mason seem like a depressing, unhappy person.

For some reason...one that isn't important...an Iraqi officer named Colonel Khalid has turned renegade. (this is before Desert Shield/Storm) While flying a routine mission over the area, Lt. Dylan and his co-pilot, Dakota are shot down. The marines on the aircraft carrier are sent to retrieve them. This might sound like it would be interesting...you'd think that SGT Mason would be doing some soul searching since his brother is in danger. But no. Mason just goes around mumbling his lines and looking like a bloated version of Sad Sack.* Other stuff happens....Dakota gets captured, but Lt. Dylan rescues her. There are various cutaways to the pentagon where we see a general worrying about the pilots. None of this is interesting because there is no character development at all.

In the end, Dylan and Dakota are pursued by the Iraqis but the Marines show up in time to save them. Ho-hum. There's a big shoot out, but its not exciting. Then of course there's the obligatory "brothers make up" scene, but its so unemotional you won't care. For that matter its hard to say if they made up at all.

What a waste! I don't know what this movie was trying to be. Was it attempting to be a tale of two half brothers that don't get along, but learn to respect each other? Or was it the tale of political unrest in the middle east? Or was it just a military action movie? No matter what it tried to be, this movie failed miserably. To put in a term used in the military this flick was a big "soup sandwich".

Best Lines: None. At least none worth repeating.

1.) Man, that embassy has some wimpy ass gates.

2.) Lt. Dylan has to explain a whole lot of stuff to his significant other, Clarissa. Stuff that she should at least have minimal knowledge of. When he explains about his half brother she acts like she never knew he had a half brother....did they just meet yesterday? For the love of Pete, this is his wife! He just finished knocking her boots! She should know he has a half brother!! Dylan also has to explain to her about flight operations on an aircraft carrier. Ok, I can understand that. She's not in the military. But the way he gives this information is too "Discovery Channelish" to me. If I wanted a rundown on Aircraft carriers I'd have rented the Time-Life videos!

3.) Is it just me or is Melanie Shatner just damned annoying? I don't understand why she bugs me as much as she does. She's not unattractive. She's a terrible actress, but there are lots of terrible actresses that don't get to me as much. Have you ever noticed though, that she always has this look on her face like she's just swallowed something icky?

NUDITY AND SEX: Clarissa's boobs are seen. I didn't time it...its probably just outside of the first ten minutes of the movie so I don't know if it countries as clear sign of the film's suckiness. I'll have to ask Dr. Freex.

HUH?: I don't know where this was filmed, but when the pilots eject it sure looks like its over somewhere in the Midwest rather than somewhere in the middle east. I could be wrong though. My experience in the middle east showed me little more than barren desert.

Here's a few minor points....when the marines come to the rescue a marine fires an M-60 at the Iraqis. He fires three shots...Pow! Pow! Pow! Only an M-60 is a crew served machine gun! There's no burst setting or single shot setting. Granted, its not impossible. But kinda weird.

When Zach and Col. Khalid fight, Khalid punches Zach in the stomach and Zach makes the appropriate "UGH" noise. Only Zach has on body armor. Unless Khalid is really [unwrite]ing strong I think it would have hurt him more than it did Zach.

Why doesn't the Chinook (the helicopter the marines are on) have an escort? Chinooks are large and relatively slow aircraft. They make easy targets, especially in an area where you know there are hostile forces!

THE TALLY: Before you use those few bucks to rent this movie go to the kids section and rent the GI Joe movie. Its better than this flick. Only hardcore Michael Madsen fans should bother with it. Well, hardcore Madsen fans that have had lobotomies.