My wife and I went to Lloret De Mar last weekend. It was for our anniversary. Its a beautiful place and it can be a lot of fun. I've probably written about it before in the past, since this is the third time I've been there. (second for my wife) Of course the entire city is one big beach resort. There's nothing but hotels, bars, gift shops, and dance clubs and lots and lots of sun and beach. A topless beach I might add. People, especially young people from all over Europe go there and the place is literally packed. Its a fun place to be if you're married, but if you're a single red-blooded guy its paradise! The only problem with going there for us is the bus ride.
Yeah, we could probably fly but it would cost more. Travel agencies have package tours for ridiculously low prices, but you gotta ride a bus for about 13 to 15 hours to get there. For about 420 bucks we could have had 4 days and three nights with hotel meals included if I had gone to the Travel office. But the Single Soldier Association here usually has trips around labor day to Lloret for 179 per person. Not too much of a drop in price, but I've said it before I'm cheap. I'm also stupid because the bus ride was hell.
Now, we knew from last year that a lot of the single guys in the barracks that go on the trip get rowdy on the bus. That's no real surprise. They bring boom boxes and more alcohol than a sane person would carry and try to party all night during the ride. But there's a kind of rule to it: If you're going to be loud and drunk and party sit in the rear of the bus. If you want to try and sleep and rest so you'll be fresh when we arrive in the morning sit up front. and the people in the back are asked to restrain themselves so the people in the front can have some measure of peace. Last year it kind of worked out. The partyers partied and it got loud, much to my wife's annoyance, but by 2 AM (We left around 6 PM the evening before) the party people decided to get some rest also and even realized that some people up front were trying to sleep. The music went off and all was good.
This year I learned that I now actively hate several people around here. A mild dislike of rap music has now become full blown loathing. I will never be ashamed to be an African American, but I really wish some people weren't. I won't mention names, but I'll tell you there were several idiots on this bus and the two worst were Loudmouth and Fugly.(Not their real names of course but these names fit, trust me.) First of all Loudmouth, Fugly and their various loathsome friends didn't have the brain capacity to not shout everything they said...as if the louder they said something the more witty it became. (And these guys probably wouldn't know wit if it crawled into bed with them and gave them a blowjob) Even though they were asked ahead of time to not use profanity because there was a TEN YEAR OLD CHILD WITH HER MOTHER on the bus....and I'm not joking...they said "[unwrite], [unwrite] and NIGGA" every ten seconds. They also referred to females as "HO, BITCH and PUSSY" without fail every time. Loudly. Did I mention my wife was on the bus? There were other females there too, two of them were friends of Fugly and Loudmouth (not dates) and hey, I'll call them Skank and Slut. (one of them even had a T shirt that red "Beat me, [unwrite] me, etc."...my wife glanced at her and said there's a person with no self respect.) Skank and Slut weren't bad looking but they repulsed me. I'd swear off sex entirely if my only choices in life were either of them. I know Skank wasn't my biggest fan since here I was married to a white woman. Yeah, well, Skank, my wife doesn't wear T shirts saying "Beat me, [unwrite] me, piss on me" etc and she more importantly doesn't refer to herself as a "Ho" or "bitch."
Oh dear God, the music. Its bad enough that someone would want to listen to a rap song where all the words are mostly "Nigga, Ho, and bitch", but these songs....I heard the word "Nigga" so many times the leader of the KKK would have cried....and that was the music! Why anyone would want to listen to music that uses words that dehumanizes them is beyond me. Do Chinese rappers use the word "Chink"? Do Latino rappers make songs about "Wetbacks"? I don't get it. Its disgusting. And good lord, there were children on the freaking bus! You know the only thing that makes it worse....the fact that these cretins had several five gazillion watt boom boxes and tried to out-noise each other! All night. No one got any sleep. I really felt bad for another guy who sat across from me. His wife was so angry you could almost hear her teeth grinding above the noise. Yeah, I'll call it noise. There's no way that trash is music. No way.
A final nail in the coffin of any kind of peace was the kid sitting behind my wife. For some reason he decided to sing (badly) some crappy song with lyrics that went like "I want to hear you moan". (Didn't help that he kept kicking her chair either) While sitting behind my wife. My quickly losing- her-temper wife. He wasn't very bright but he did manage to shut up when I turned around and said "Will you PLEASE stop that!". (No question mark, because it was a demand not a question)
I might as well heap some more embarrassment. Loudmouth, Fugly and company decided they had to act like "gangstas" at every rest stop. Yay. The French will probably ban African Americans now. Since they wanted to continue their behavior in one rest stop I waited outside until they all came out of the shop with their munchies before I went in. One lady asked me why I was just standing there by the door. I told her "because I don't anyone...not even a stranger I'll never see again...to think I'm with them.".
My wife was right in one thing....these jackasses called each other "nigga" constantly IN PUBLIC (and in front of...do I have to say it again...CHILDREN!) but if she were to call them that they'd be screaming to the EO office in two seconds. You know, I don't think you can have it both ways, Loudmouth. You either accept that its a nasty, dirty word and only a real asshole would use it and a bigger asshole use it to describe himself, or you admit that you're a huge asshole. There were several people on the bus (both black and white) that were completely appalled by these cro-magnons, but like myself they knew if they attempted to suggest consideration for others and maybe some sense of self respect the Loudmouth and Fugly crew would only get louder. What a bunch of assholes. As one guy, a marine said to me in his disgust, "No marine or soldier should act like that. They were just wrong.". He was wrong. NO ONE should act like that, period.
But at least once we arrived in Spain, my wife and I had a good time. But man, you've never seen how fast we got away from these guys once we got there.
So in closing, let me leave a few tips for any wanna be Loudmouths, Fugly's, Skanks and Sluts out there.
1. Just because you may be an African American it doesn't mean you have the right to be inconsiderate to anyone who isn't. Not everyone wants to hear what you have to say. Especially since most of it isn't worth the breath you expended saying it.
2. Calling yourself (or anyone else) "nigga, ho, bitch, dawg, (I especially hate 'dawg'...whenever someone does call me that I tell them not to.) etc is stupid. It is. Just deal with it. Try not to do it. When you do you demean yourself, the people around you and the people that died trying to get rid of names like that.
3. If you do want to call yourself and your friends "nigga" in public (and loudly) then hey, don't get bent out of shape when no one respects you. You can't go around wearing a jester hat and not want people to think you're not a fool. Just don't do it around me or my friends.
4. You wanna listen to rap songs with lots of "niggas" and "ho's" in it. Knock yourself out. Just bring some earphones if you're going to be around other people that you know won't want to hear it. If you wonder why a person blasting loud and offensive music is generally frowned upon, read number three again.
5. Hey, its alright to be on bus trip with friends and play music and drink. It is. Just remember to try and tone it down for the benefit of other people. A little consideration goes a long way.
6. Even if you don't get a clue from reading this, try not to be obnoxious around children. The ten year old girl on the bus probably doesn't like thinking she's a "Ho" or a "bitch". And when she grows up actively disliking "niggas" think about what you did to bring her to that conclusion.
7. If someone points out that you're acting like Loudmouth and Fugly don't pull the old "Its like dat in da 'hood where I grew up!". Listen 'dawg', welcome to Planet Earth. Your 'hood is a very very small part of it. Just because a person may be from Scotland it doesn't mean they have to swear a lot and wear a kilt. By pulling that excuse you're saying "I'm incapable of learning how to act in a larger society"...in effect, you're stupid. Just because it worked for Kasper Hauser doesn't mean it'll work for you.
8. I checked....there really isn't an official rule book stating that a black person has to like rap music. There also isn't some kind of hip hop ten commandments stating things like "Thou shalt always blast thy boom box and car stereo so that thy neighbor will be annoyed verily". That's good news because personally I hate watermelon and basketball.
9. If you feel the need to drink a beer or any other alcoholic beverage at 10 in the morning, you have a problem. If you bring a CASE of beer on a 15 hour bus trip you might have a problem unless you plan on giving other people free beers. If you get sick on the bus next to me you're really going to have a problem. ( Like getting that bottle out of your ass, in which I shall shove it)
10. If your friends act like Loudmouth or Fugly you might want to think about making some new friends. That is, if you want people to take you serious. Just like its impolite to fart in a crowded elevator, its impolite to act like a [unwrite]head in public. (calling yourself or others "Nigga" DOES make you a [unwrite]head. Live with it.) No one cares how you and your friends act in private, but if you want to be a [unwrite]head in public expect to be labeled as a [unwrite]head.
And a special note to the Skanks and Ho's out there. You complain that "white women are taking your best men?" Um, you're calling yourself "Nigga, Ho and Bitch" loudly and wearing a "bite me, [unwrite] me", etc t-shirt. Your male friends all call you "Ho" and "bitch" in public and you like it. What kind of man did you think you were gonna get, honey?
Yep, I know someone must be offended by this rant. Too bad. The truth does hurt sometime, because I didn't enjoy living through this and it sure ain't fun to write about. But it needed to be said.